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Sand and Stars

19 years old
Never been away from home before

Provincetown in the off season
Evenings on the chilly beach

I sat in my Rabbit,
watching the sky through its moon-roof

My first ever shooting stars
Over and over, night after night

I might've taken it as a sign to stay,
but nonetheless, I went home again.

And never in the many years since
have I ever seen anything like it.

Fishing for votes

Vote for me, vote for me!

Also, cheshire23, lawchicky, and padf00t. And, y'know, any others you find really awesome. :)
(Intersection with padf00t. His can be found here.)

You can't save everyone, especially when they don't want to be saved. I know that, of course, but that doesn't stop me from trying. What good would I be in this profession if I didn't try? Sometimes, they are beyond my reach. Sometimes, they just don't want help. Sometimes, I get very attached and feel like I've failed them if I can't make a breakthrough. Logically, I know it's not about me. Logically, I know I am human and they are human and we're in a relationship together. I cannot "fix" anyone; I cannot help those who don't want to be helped.

There's always one, though. At any given time, there is always one client who makes me want to bang my head against the desk. Or bang his/her head against the desk. Metaphorically speaking, of course! Yes, I do have one such case right now. I can't give you much information due to patient confidentiality, but what I will say is this: it is infuriating trying to help someone who rebuffs me at every turn.

I gave all I had to give. The rest is up to the client.

LJI B, Week 0: Introduction

Hey, padf00t here. You don't know me; this is my first attempt at LJI, and I don't really know anyone here. Thankfully dawnstar was looking for someone to write about, or maybe I'd just slip through the cracks. This way, some of you will get to know me - or at least, my name - before the game really gets going!

So let me tell you a little bit about me. Surprisingly, my LJ is not actually written by a shapeshifting wizard with a penchant for getting into trouble, but I *am* a major Harry Potter fan. Not just Harry Potter, though. I'm really into mythology, horror, and certain types of history, so really it's no wonder JK would've caught my attention with her books.

For me, the perfect vacation would include a tour of Alcatraz and other abandoned areas by day, and paranormal/ghost tours by night. At least one day of ziplining, or roller coasters, or something else to get my blood pumping, too. And on the trip back home, I would spend my time watching 90s TV, playing video games, or reading about forensic science.

Yep, that's me in a nutshell. Nice to meet you all!


lawchicky (indirectly) talked me into it. I'm in for LJ Idol Exhibit B. :)

School conference

We had our second parent-teacher conference this afternoon, and I have to say I'm feeling frustrated. She couldn't say enough positive things about him on an academic level, but it's all stuff we knew - reading well above grade level, making improvements in small motor, etc. But she is really focussed on his "maturity," as well. He doesn't have the best judgment/decision-making skills, and shows a lot of following behaviors, particularly gravitating towards kids who are acting out. (A couple of weeks ago, there was a series of incidents which led to him missing part of recess for each day of that week, and he has since been advised to seek out different playmates during that time of day.)

The frustration comes from the fact that I just don't know if this really *is* a maturity issue. I acted out as a kid because I was *bored*. If he's well ahead of grade level academically, then it's no surprise he is easily distracted by kids doing things they aren't supposed to and acting silly.

The other thing is his moods. He's been very clingy and anxious/fearful lately, which may very well just be a developmental thing, but could be something else. He also just said that he really misses his friend from whom he's been somewhat separated, so I think that's getting to him as well.

While we were there, his teacher asked him a question - I don't even remember what it was - and instead of answering right away, he clung to my side and clammed up. I haven't been able to get him to explain why that happened.

I also think that sometimes he doesn't KNOW that he's not supposed to do something. We have snowball fights at home, so why would it be not-okay to throw snow at school? He was in the coatroom this morning chatting with a friend, and why is it not OK to be in there? (I don't quite understand this one myself, but I *think* he and a friend started talking and lost track of time and forgot to go into the classroom after hanging up their coats.) He genuinely seems to not understand what he's done wrong, some of the time.

Maybe we were wrong. Maybe he shouldn't have started school yet. I just know that right now he's unhappy, and I'm dissatisfied. I'm not sure what to do, how to help him, or what the answers are to any of this.

The thing is, he says he LOVES school. And he's thriving there in almost every way. So how do we, as his parents, help him along with the rest of it?


I just did a significant Friend List trimming - mostly people I either have lost touch with entirely or keep in touch with elsewhere. I don't use this site as much as I used to, anyway. Please do not take it personally if you were cut - chances are if you're reading this at all, we probably talk elsewhere more than we correspond on here.
And a killer sinus infection. No wonder I've been so miserable!


New Account

If anyone is interested in following my therealljidol progress, I've created a new account for it, thereby allowing me to add new friends without worrying about giving away too much personal info.

That account is dawnstar4idol.


Taking the plunge

lawchicky talked me into it (though it didn't take a huge amount of convincing, I admit). I'm joining therealljidol. I don't write as much as I'd like, outside of therapeutic journaling, and I think this will get the creative juices flowing.

Here goes nothing! :)

Latest Month

May 2013